We're on a river that ends...

I can't even remember the rest of the words- they were with me a little while ago, but now they are just nowhere to be found. A little on the abstract side but, not really. Here's to life, love, and what might have been...

Identity - unedited

Identity, An Exploration

(the unedited version)

6 entries found for identity… the 6^th is mathematical, and therefore irrelevant

1. The collective aspect of the set of characteristics by which a thing is definitively recognizable or known
2. The set of behavioral or personal characteristics by which an individual is recognizable as a member of a group.
3. The quality or condition of being the same as something else.
4. The distinct personality of an individual regarded as a persisting entity; individuality.
5. (-dnt-t) n. pl. i·den·ti·ties

6. Intentionally left blank.

Identity. Identities, plural. The search for who I am.

Identity is relative, refers to the surrounding environment.

A person as defined by her surroundings.

A person referred to by gender ( male or female or…)

A gender subject to discussion in race (black or white or…)

A Race subject to debate in culture (a literary artifact, a musical note, a…)

A culture subject to dissection by the corporation (ammunition for exploitation…)

A corporation dictating social identity

(Where?

wear, buy,

Whereby to

consume

Consummate the

Marriage

Marred image

Between / bit by bit wean

Us and/onto them

To gain (obtain, receive something that one previously lacked)

To gain (weight, obsess, abuse, obiese)

To pain, to in-sane, too insane too inane

Freedom within? (it has been there all along)

Freedom without? (stripped of labels, devoid of barriers, do we float in nothing?)

Success (achievement, accomplishment, a sense of identity)

Defined, measured, constricted, refined in the minds of other people

The group collective

The group informative

The group definitive

The group illusive, vague, internal and best described as what you see in your own head

Images, ideas, filtered by assumption

Carved out by experiences

Distorted or elated by perception

What else matters, but your own of your own?

Identity- so wrapped up in what “everyone else thinks”

So wrapped up in “who everyone wants me to be”

So wrapped up in “where, when, why…”

Who cares?

Who cares. I am who.

Well... I am almost at the end of a 7 day journey. A journey into, well, the self I guess. Upon being challenged to spend a week essentially by myself to vacate the busyness, to settle some scores - in my own head:) and to find out that I wouldn't spontaneously combust or melt into a big pile of goo, and they were right. I'm still here. And all the better for it, I hope. I'm tempted to log and journal all of the things that I kept myself occupied with, but that probably also goes against the whole point of what I was supposed to do in the first place which was nothing. I'm not sure if I've perfected the art of "being" but I can say that there is progress.
I chose Miss Audrey because she represents to me the emobodiment of what it means to fully embrace womanhood- just look at her- graceful, elegant, beautiful, yet strong and confident and yet there is a smile on her lips that gives away her playfullness. A toast to Audrey- and everything black and shiny!

COME SEE MY PLAY!

Hey Cats...

What: Come and see the play that I've written and directed called, "A Walk in the Park"...

Where: The Matsqui Centennial Auditorium

When: Sunday June 25th, 2006 at 7pm SHARP; remember kids, this is theatre and you gotta be there or they won't let you in:)

Why: because we're crazy and it's a whole lotta fun!
and because it stars 2 fabulous peeps- the one and only Jamie Field and the stellar Andrew McGowan
and because it is you have to find out:

"Will John the eccentric, married to his routine and plagued by a peanut-butter loving alter-ego be able to stand up to the witty banter of zany Eliza along with her imaginary pet squirrell, or is he in danger of losing his bachelorhood forever? Not just for the saps... but a statement for relationships everywhere:)"

How much- $7 from me or Andrew or Jamie or $9 at the door

SEE YOU THERE!

Descriptive Draft Two

We had to write an article for my Language Arts class... a description taken from one of several brainstorms we had to engage in. I chose my worst fear... take what you can from it.

What I will become

Circle. A halo of sounds. Clock ticks, computer buzzes, fridge whirrs. Fridge creaks. Open, close. Open, close. Open, closed. Emphasis on the “d”. Cat scratch, cat pounce, cat piss. Six cats, six bowls, six howling, creeping, hissing cats. Light blinks, light winks, light flickers and dies. Car alarm – WAILS, and calms – embeds, enlightens, elates the noise.

Line. Line of dust, line of rust, line of “I must…” and then Mr. Clean, Mr. Lean, Mr. Clean up your shit and get it right this time. Mr. One last time, Mr. Find me at the table with my head in my arms. With my head in my hands, with the head of the class blinking in bold bright lights on the wall. Papers, letters, numbers dates, lining the kitchen slash office, slash living room, slash every damn room.

Achievements, accomplishments, deeds and dedication - evidence of time well wasted. Of time ill-tasted, of time you can’t face, can’t erase. Anymore.

Square. View of the table – sharp edges, clean lines, dark exterior, mottled under wood –her solid reflection. The square, the edgy bitch, the neurotic, too-tanned, too fat, too lethargic, blotchy one reflected in her symbiotic table. Table of contents: one shell, 6 cats, 3 diet pills, and a bottle of self-tanning lotion. Self – do it yourself, think of only yourself, self is all that matters, mattered. Matters, mattered. Will matter – matter is solid. Solid in form, measurable, weighable, with substance. Self matters, weight is relative.

Pyramid. There is a pile of leaves on the floor beneath the plant – brown and shriveled. Tomorrow they will pay homage to the great garbage god. She will clean-rampage late tonight. Mr. Clean will solace her shortcomings. It is what puts order to her world.