It's called Breaking -up because...

Well, I can say that the last couple of days have been filled with a lot of different emotions- of which being in a strange state of numb has been the most predominant, tears next in line, followed by a myriad of others including peace, release, sadness, and comfort. Breaking up is so strange- letting go you always just want to hold onto something and as you came to pick up your stuff everything seemed so final- yet not as we watched movies and laughed and chatted like good friends. I was looking for pics to express how I was feeling and found this one because it reminded me of a play that we had to read in one of my English Lit courses- called the "Occupation of Heather Rose" about a young and ambitious girl who goes to be a nurse way up north in Ontario and ends up growing up in so many ways, going through things that she never thought she would have to go through and learning through the bittersweet- things get pretty rough in the winter time and everyone is just waiting for the time called "break up" where the winter ice starts to break away from the trees and the life and starts to melt away so that spring can come again- almost a coming into joy, but having to go through something to get there. Those are my reflections of the moment. Being with David was one of the greatest and hardest things I've ever done- I think you learn so much of who you are yourself in a relationship. Things that you never knew you had that could be great (like joy, learning to accept love, to be appreciated, to be pursued, and to have someone walk through difficult times of healing with you, but also to laugh, to learn, and to love) and things in yourself that you desire to come to the light (like pushing through conflict and learning to balance independance with the desire to be with the person that means the world to you). I have to smile as I write these things- thanks for calling me muffin, muffin... and for starting me on the road to driving standard (easy, easy now:)) And thanks to amigos that listen, love, and tell you what's what when you need it.